We know that this year, social-emotional learning is as important as ever. For classrooms that don’t have a formal SEL curriculum, and for parents who want to supplement their students’ development of these skills at home, here are some no-prep to low-prep strategies for building students’ social-emotional skills.
For teachers:
Name what students are doing well.
Save the general praise for parents to give their kids at home. Instead of telling students that they did a great job, name exactly what it is that they did well. Also use language that makes it clear that they demonstrated what you were looking for. Sometimes, in an effort to prevent vague praise, it can be unclear to students whether the feedback is positive or negative, which can cause confusion. Instead of saying, “you were able to use commas to separate items in a list,” say “We’ve been working on using commas in lists, and you nailed it!”
Also give specific and concrete areas for improvement.
In addition to naming what students are having success with, also identify their individual next steps toward growth. Students always need to hear what they’re doing well, but they also need to know where there’s room for improvement. In this feedback, try to be as specific as possible. Instead of saying “remember to show all your work!” try, “I noticed that you remembered to write the equation for this problem…Next time be sure to show how you broke down the numbers in order to multiply them.”
Empower students to help each other.
One of the most powerful ways to build students’ social skills is through increasing their responsibility within the classroom community. Many teachers assign their students classroom jobs, but these jobs often don’t involve peer-to-peer interaction. When we give students responsibility that relates to their classmates’ academic well-being, they almost always rise to the occasion. Use your students’ strengths to determine what appropriate roles might look like.
For example, if you have a student who is a fast-finisher in writing, and is especially good at identifying specific grammatical elements, like sentence fragments, ask them if they would mind proofreading their peers’ writing. Of course, they’ll have to be willing. And classmates should have the option between teacher and peer revision for their own work. Jobs like this need to be heavily taught into, but the pay-off is well worth the investment. Plus, when you give students more supervised control, you’re letting them take a bit of the burden off your shoulders!
For parents:
Offer frequent and genuine praise.
We all want our children to be the best they can be. This often leads to well-intentioned parents only focusing on ways their child can improve. They sometimes forget that praise is important, too. For children to grow up with true confidence in themselves, they need a little external confidence from those they love and trust. As you push them toward greatness, be sure to remind them regularly how great you think they already are.
Talk about feelings.
Don’t shy away from talking about emotions, especially your own. Children need to learn that it’s okay for us to experience the whole gamut of emotions from day to day. Talk to them about your positive and negative emotions, where they come from, and the healthy ways that you cope with them.
Start a family journaling routine.
Journaling can do wonders for all ages. But it’s even more effective when the whole family is involved. Use your judgment to decide whether your child would benefit more from a family journal that everyone contributes to, or from everyone having their own journal. This solidarity can make a child much more willing and comfortable to maintain the routine long-term.
For teachers and parents:
Teach students mindfulness.
No matter where a student is in any given moment throughout their day, there will be situations in which they just need to breathe. Although breathing is something that we all do constantly, slowing down and bringing awareness to our breath can be a powerful strategy in self-regulation. Help students practice this type of breathing regularly so that in moments of emotional distress, they’ll know what to do to help themselves calm down.
Use visualization strategies.
In addition to breathing mindfully, many students (and people of all ages!) benefit from visualization. Visualization can consist of just about anything a student can picture in their mind that helps them find some peace. For some people, this is a place, while for others, it’s an image or a pattern, or even an abstract thought. Model for students as many different types of visualizations as possible, so that they can experiment with what works best for them.
Create a “zen zone.”
Finally, children always need a safe place that they can go when their emotions become too overwhelming. Create a safe space in the classroom and in the home where anyone can go when they need some space. In the classroom, this is often a corner of the room, sometimes called a “chill out zone” or a “break corner.” Involve students in naming it! They’ll be even more likely to use it as it’s intended. At home, this space could simply be a child’s bedroom. If the bedroom is shared, get creative with finding an area or two of the house that you can designate as this “zen zone,” where your child will be able to go if and when they need some space to practice self-regulation.
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